Memoirs of a Mentor, Part 1

[Courtney Tarter is originally from Bethlehem Baptist Church in Minneapolis, a recovering feminist, and regular contributor to Gender Blog.  Her love of the gospel and desire to serve women speaks for itself in this two part series. - David Kotter]

I used to think that discipleship was about me. As I felt God calling me to ministry I began feeling the burden to minister to other women, which was not a wrong desire. But, I thought it would work my way. And my way was a romantic idea of finding a girl to disciple. We would meet. I would see her desperate need for my help, and I would disciple her and change her life. Thankfully, God rescued me from this sinful and very wrong idea.

I first met Brittany in the beginning of my senior year. She was a freshman who I didn't have any real interest in getting to know. She immediately had a lot of friends, and I, in my sinfulness, questioned her love for the gospel because of her friends. The week before I left for Fall Break she approached me in the cafeteria. Freshman couldn't have cars and she needed a ride home for break. I just so happened to be the only girl on our campus who lived near her house and the last thing I wanted to do was to give her a ride home. I definitely knew God would rather me use my drive time for my personal edification—not driving some freshman home. I thought that I had already had a hard semester trying to disciple women, and I needed the break. But I had no legitimate reason to say no, so one week later we were headed to Michigan for break.

God used that ride to shatter a lot of pride in my heart. I told her that we would listen to sermons on the way home (thinking that she probably wouldn't want to do that, but I was going to put my foot down anyway), but she seemed very excited about the idea and I still remember the encouragement that I felt when I saw her pull her Bible out and take notes. She and I shared our testimonies, which were very similar, and she asked me a lot of questions about moving on from a sinful past because hers was fresher than mine. As the drive continued, the Lord began to soften my heart towards her. And the entire week that I was home I felt the Lord leading me to ask her if she wanted to meet on a regular basis.

It was after that drive that we began to meet almost every week for nearly two years. We went to church together every Sunday, we prayed together often, and I always looked forward to our rides home at breaks. God used her to break my preconceptions about discipleship. God knew exactly what I needed when he brought Brittany into my life.

Discipleship is not about me seeking out the girl who I thought needed the most help, rather discipleship is about me being obedient to the Titus 2 mandate that God has placed on my life. Discipleship was just as much, if not more, of a sanctifying process for me than it even was for Brittany. As I would seek to pour truth into her, I myself had to believe in and know the gospel that I was proclaiming. We always joke about how I always have the same experiences right before she does, and God has used all of those experiences in both of us to conform us more into the image of his Son. As I grew in my relationship with the Lord, I grew in my relationship with Brittany because she and I were both striving for the same goal.