Is Complementarianism Merely a Personal Conviction?

Over the years, many have objected to our stance that every home and church should be ordered in such a way as to honor the biblical mandate for men to lead in these two areas.  "That may be your conviction," they say, "but we see it differently.  After all, many good people on both sides of the debate disagree, so why not just let everyone choose for themselves a viable option that works for them?"  The sentiment is that as long as the church or married couple love God and are trying to reach the lost, why quibble over who is leading or who does the preaching?

I understand that many grow weary of doctrinal debates and theological challenges.  But the church has always dealt with difficulties in one area or another and it is important for every generation of believers to clearly defend and articulate the biblical message.  I believe it is possible for someone to be wrong on the gender issue, but still be a believer.  So being an egalitarian does not mean you are not a Christian, but it does cripple the discipleship process for that person for the rest of their life.  Being a complementarian cannot be merely a matter of personal conviction because the gender issue is tied to so many key areas of Christian theology and practice.  Much is at stake in this debate:

1. The authority of scripture is at stake.

The Bible clearly teaches that men and women are equal in value and dignity and have distinct and complementary roles in the home and the church.  If churches disregard these teachings and accommodate the culture, then the members of those churches and subsequent generations will be less likely to submit to God's word in other difficult matters as well.

2.The health of the home is at stake.

If families do not structure their homes properly, in disobedience to the teaching of Ephesians 5, 1 Peter 3, and Colossians 3, then they will not have the proper foundation upon which to withstand the temptations of the devil and the various onslaughts of the world.  This hinders the sanctification of married couples and also introduces confusion about basic parenting issues such as raising masculine sons and feminine daughters.

3. The health of the church is at stake.

Just like the home, if the church disobeys the teaching of 1Timothy 2, 1 Corinthians 11 and disregards the structure that God put into place for the community of faith from the beginning, then the church will be weakened.  If the church is weakened in its convictions, it will be less effective in accomplishing its mission.

4. Our worship is at stake.

Increasingly, members of the evangelical community, in the name of gender equality, are advocating calling God "mother" as often as we call him "father."  God has named Himself and for us to make changes to His self revelation not only undermines the written Word, but also undermines God's authority in our lives.  The very nature of our triune God is revealed in a biblically ordered marriage. God means to be seen and savored through the ‘lens' of complementary relationships between the sexes.

5. Bible translations are at stake.

There are many who are currently advocating for Bible translations that would essentially be "gender-neutral."  These translations, in hundreds of places, remove the words he, him, his, brother, father, son, and man.  While much more information can be found here, my concern is that in the name of gender equality, the Bible is undermined and the very words of God end up being revised.

6. The advance of the Gospel is at stake.

Ephesians 5 calls husbands and wives to relate to one another as a picture of Christ and the church.  The picture involves the humble, sacrificial leadership of the husband and the joyful, intelligent submission to that leadership by the wife.  Husbands and wives who model this improperly portray a distorted and false picture of Jesus Christ, the Head and Savior of His bride, the church.  Deviation from biblical teaching on manhood and womanhood distorts the picture of Christ and the Church, and hinders the advance of the gospel.

More precious realities of life and godliness hang on how one interprets and obeys Scripture on the issue of manhood and womanhood. Why is this issue so important? Because the message of the Gospel of Jesus Christ cannot be severed from the methods he has authorized to spread it. Homes and churches in which manhood and womanhood are prized advance the Gospel and the glory of God more accurately than any other kind of home or church.

May it be said that, in this generation and by His grace, a winsome voice is heard joyfully "proclaiming God's glorious design for manhood and womanhood in the church and in the home" as a personal conviction and more: a pervasive achievement of grace.