Having been recently introduced to Tony Glenville's 2006 Top to Toe: A Comprehensive Guide to the Grooming of the Modern Male, I was reminded once again how determined our culture is to make men more like women.   Now I realize that certain things are important to properly present oneself.  I take showers, have my hair regularly cut, generally wear clothes that match, have some nice suits and ties, shave regularly, and even wear men's cologne on occasion.  I know that there are certain fabrics that are cooler in the summer and warmer in the winter.  But the overemphasis on these types of things has encouraged a softness that is neither attractive nor helpful in terms of cultivating the characteristics that men need in order to honor their biblically sanctioned roles.

For instance, Glenville advises, "A special occasion calls for special treatment, and taking the time to visit your hairdresser, go for a massage, and have a facial scrub will all add to your confidence."  In another section, he tells us, "At sporting events, whether cheering your team on or participating yourself, the wrong footwear can completely skew an outfit."  I wonder if Chipper Jones knows this?  Here's one of my favorites: "After work, before bed, when stressed, or simply as a pick-me-up before a party, the slow pampering of a bath is special."  In addition to this, one finds out the essentials of the bathroom which include moisturizer, eye cream, manicure kit, pedicure kit, body moisturizer, and body scrub.  Can you imagine our great grandfathers talking like this?  Exchanging tips for dry skin and split ends?  With regard to hands Glenville notes that, "Caring for your hands is not a question of vanity or fussiness, it is common sense.  Boardroom or factory, dinner table or diner, your hands are much in evidence at work or at leisure and are able to communicate a great deal about your approach to life." Indeed!

Granted, the book has some helpful tips.  Knowing how to put on a tie is important for a man to know.  Caring for shoes is also needful.   But so much of the instruction tends toward an unhealthy, hyper, self preoccupation.  The roles to which men are called are stifled and hindered by such tendencies.  In fact, self absorption is the enemy of true biblical masculinity.  The leadership to which men are called is for the good of those whom he is leading.  A self absorbed man will lead for his own good, his own self aggrandizement.  The role of protector to which men are called is for the well being of another.  A self preoccupied man will let others be harmed while he fends for himself.  The role of provider to which men are called is for the welfare of others.  A selfish man will provide for himself at the expense of others.

Men reading Glenville's book will only be encouraged in their sinful tendency to look out for themselves.  If men are focused on such trivial things as dry skin and pampering themselves with long baths, it will be all the more difficult to expect them to lead, provide, and protect.  There may be a day when Lowes and Home Depot have entire aisles dedicated to moisturizers and skin creams for that weathered carpenter.  There may be rows of scented bubble bath for that overworked mason.  But if the church continues to follow the culture, we will have plenty of "Top to Toe" men, able to shop with the best of them at Bath and Body Works, but unwilling and unable to fulfill the Gospel demands that require toughness, self sacrifice, and self-neglect. We do not need prettier boys.  We do not need softer men.  What we need is a church culture that will call boys and men to lives of self sacrifice as exampled by the picture of Christ in Ephesians 5 who loved the church and gave himself for her to his own neglect and sacrifice.  What we need are pastors who will boldly preach about and press for an ethos in their churches that expects this type of behavior from their men.  What we need is a church culture that will require boys and men to do hard things, to cultivate toughness, resilience, and courage, top to toe.

There have been few Christian leaders over the past 60 years who have articulated a more robust, clear-headed and courageous case for historic evangelical Christianity than British theologian J.I. Packer. Biblical studies, soteriology, theology proper, ethics, church history—name the Christian worldview sub-category—and J.I. Packer has written and lectured extensively on it. Dr. Packer represents a trustworthy voice among evangelicals.

During an interview earlier this year, Dr. Packer demonstrated his customary stalwart commitment to the authority of Scripture on the topic of homosexuality and "same-sex marriage." Dr. Packer argues that the embrace of homosexuality is a first-order Gospel issue that Scripture addresses with unbending clarity. Dr. Packer is an Anglican and his assertion of biblical authority represents a prophetic call to a church that is seething with controversy over issues of sexuality even as the Lambeth Conference continues this week in Kent. Below is a transcript of the interview in Q&A format. Audio is available at Between Two Worlds.

Q: Why is this such an important issue?

Packer: Because it denies something that is integral to the Christian Gospel. That is, whereas the Bible says that same-sex unions are off-limits as far as God is concerned and that the Gospel requires anyone involved in them to repent of that involvement and to abandon it, this point of view against which we are standing treats gay marriages and gay unions as a form of holiness and encourages, affirms and blesses them rather than saying to them, as we believe the Gospel requires us to say, ‘Look, this is the wrong track. You are required to abandon it. And we in the Christian fellowship will help you to not yield to your besetting temptation and that is God's way for you.'

We are obliged by the Gospel to say that because the apostle Paul in proclaiming the Gospel to the Corinthians that they mustn't be deceived...He gives a series of life patterns of which living in a homosexual relationship is one and he says those living in [these types of relationships] won't inherit the kingdom of God. In other words, they don't qualify for the salvation in terms of the Gospel that God has revealed.

Q: So, to bless that behavior is a direct contradiction of Scripture? Can there be any compromise on this issue?

Packer: I don't think so because the Scripture teaching that is being denied is an element of the Gospel itself—that is, God's message about how we sinners can be saved. If you refuse to repent at some point where the Gospel requires you to repent, you are not walking according to the Gospel, and Paul says your soul is in danger. I don't want to believe that, but I dare not disbelieve it. It is apostolic teaching. It is the Word of God. So, I help gay people not to get into gay relationships.

Q: Is this a direct attack on Scripture?

Packer: I believe so, though to explain that takes a moment. The folk who are affirming gay sex as a form of holiness, they are understanding the Bible in a very different way from that in which the rest of us think it asks to be understood. That is, God uses language to tell us things, and the Bible is the language that is used. The Bible is personal communication from the Creator to us creatures. And in personal communication, you speak and write to be understood. You don't communicate in code. You don't say one thing in a way which is intended to be understood as meaning its opposite. God is, we believe, straight-forward and the Bible, in that sense, is straight-forward. And Paul in 1 Corinthians 6 is straight-forward.

There is a little more data in 1 Corinthians 6. Paul ends the chapter by saying to the Corinthians, "And such were some of you, but you were washed, you were justified, you were sanctified by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ"—that means by the ministry of Christ, for we do believe that from His throne Christ ministers directly to us through the Gospel—"and by the Spirit of our God." In other words, there you have, implicitly, a promise, and explicitly, a declaration that the Holy Spirit enables people who have a besetting inclination, which they know is off limits and therefore is that against which they want to stand. The Spirit of God enables them to stand and that is the center of the transformation of lifestyle which the Gospel brings. If anything, this is a first-order question right at the heart of the Christian message.

A recent news article reminded readers that "the United Church of Christ (UCC) has sent a clear message for women who believe they are called to the pastorate: Answer the call." And the article further reported that women in the UCC have done so at a rate that ranks the UCC as a leader among Protestant denominations for the ordination of women.

According to the UCC website, more than one-fourth (27 percent) of all its pastors are female; the denomination's clergy now includes 2,832 ordained women. The numbers seem to be fairly consistent across individual UCC conferences. For example, of the 624 ministers in the UCC Connecticut Conference, 236-nearly 38 percent-are women, according to the Rev. Ron Brown, associate conference minister for clergy concerns. These numbers promise to grow significantly, according to Patricia Liberty, an interim pastor at Southington's First Congregational Church, who recently told myrecordjournal.com, "More women are being ordained than men."

According to a study at http://www.hartfordinstitute.org/, the UCC ranks second of 15 Protestant denominations in percentage of ordained women. The top denomination? The Unitarian Universalist Church-in reality a non-Protestant denomination because of its rejection of fundamental Protestant doctrines-ranks first with 30 percent female clergy.

The UCC formed in 1957 through the union of two denominations, the Evangelical and Reformed Church and the Congregational Christian Churches. According to the 2007 yearbook, the United Church of Christ has approximately 1.2 million members and is composed of approximately 5,518 local congregations. The UCC is one of many among the mainline denominations that has, in recent years, been on a pronounced leftward theological trajectory. At its 2005 General Synod, the UCC affirmed "same-sex marriage," with more than 80 percent of delegates approving. Buoyed by the California Supreme Court's recent overturn of the "gay marriage" ban in that state, the UCC's California-Nevada Conference recently reaffirmed its support of "same-sex nuptials."

And like most of the mainline churches, the UCC has experienced a steady decline in membership over the past few years. According to the UCC's Statistical Handbook released early in this decade, the denomination's membership declined in 1999 by 19,406 members (1.37 percent), with 77 churches either withdrawing or closing-with the withdrawing churches taking 6,387 members with them.

Sadly, the UCC's embrace of liberalism seems to confirm the thesis of Dave Shiflett's 2005 book Exodus: Why Americans Are Fleeing Liberal Churches for Conservative Christianity. Shiflett provides compelling circumstantial and statistical evidence in favor of his argument that cultural accommodation is creating a pronounced numerical hemorrhage within mainline churches, one that is pushing members toward churches that hold a high view of Scripture.

"Americans are vacating progressive pews and flocking to churches that offer more traditional versions of Christianity...Most people go to church to get something they cannot get elsewhere. This consuming public-people who already believe, or who are attempting to believe, who want their children to believe-go to church to learn about the mysterious Truth on which they Christian religion is built. They want the Good News, not the minister's political views or intellectual coaching. The latter creates sprawling vacancies in the pews. Indeed, those empty pews can be considered earthly reward for abandoning heaven, traditionally understood."

Wayne Grudem, in his book Evangelical Feminism: A New Path to Liberalism? makes a congruent case that compromise on biblical authority in the area of gender roles in the church will only lead a church or denomination further from biblical fidelity.

The sad but true recent history of the UCC certainly does provide significant anecdotal evidence that a drift away from God's Word is never slight and never leads to authentic, "other-worldly" discipleship. This is one fundamental reason why CBMW will continue, by God's grace, to press the case for fidelity to Scripture on gender roles in the home and church.

"Biblical manhood is characterized by nothing less than indefatigable, untiring pursuit of the good of another and not yourself."

So exhorted Dr. Peter R. Schemm Jr. during a conference for men at McLean Bible Church in McLean, Virginia, on April 25-26, 2008. Schemm, who serves as Dean of The College at Southeastern in Wake Forest, North Carolina, and as a Senior Consulting Editor of The Journal for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, delivered three messages to over 900 men on "Biblical Manhood and the Role of Mentoring."

In "The Lead Role," Schemm unpacks and applies a definition of biblical manhood penned by John Piper in Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood: "At the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to lead, provide for and protect women in ways appropriate to a man's differing relationships." Working through the definition phrase-by-phrase, Schemm seeks to awaken men to a new awareness of their responsibility to lead.

Schemm's second message, "The Mentoring Mindset," explores the unique value of a man-to-man relationship from a biblical perspective. Using Proverbs 27:17 as his text-"Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another"-Schemm explains the dynamics of a male mentoring relationship: "The ultimate picture of this proverb is hard-hitting interaction-intentional friction-that produces sharpness in wisdom and keenness of character." Are you willing to sharpen-and be sharpened by-another man?

In "Obedience to Christ," Schemm insists, "Jesus Christ is the embodiment of mature manhood. If you meet Jesus Christ, you have met the perfect balance of grace and strength, of love and authority, of joy and sobriety. If you meet Christ, you will meet the greatest of all men." Schemm encourages men to know this Christ and follow him in obedience by repenting of secret sins, pride, false humility, and a general sense of neglect.

All three messages are available for download on the CBMW website.

If your church would be interested in holding a conference on biblical manhood and womanhood, please contact CBMW's This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it , Chris Cowan, for information.

CBMW desires to biblically explain God's good design for men and women because questions of doctrine do matter in daily life.  Our understanding of the truth of Scripture informs how we think about ourselves and how we relate to others.  This reality is especially evident in the church and home when we consider interactions between men and women.  For example, our understanding of 1 Timothy 2: 12 ("I do not permit a woman to teach her exercise authority over men") naturally will shape our expectation of who we expect to see teaching the Bible from the pulpit on a Sunday morning. 

Also, a husband’s understanding of 1 Peter 3:7 ("show honor to the woman as the weaker vessel since they are heirs with you of the grace of life") will influence whether or not he holds open a door, elbows his way into a lifeboat, or uses his strength to save himself during an earthquake rather than a class of students under his charge.  A woman who understands that men and women are both saved in the same way through the blood of Jesus Christ, will not expect Galatians 3:28 ("There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.") to suggest that there is no longer an ethnic difference between Jews and Gentiles nor distinguishable characteristics between men and women.

Mike Seaver at the blog Role Calling understands the shaping effects of sound doctrine, and is facilitating a conversation about gender roles and God's design of men and women.  His recent post A Semi-Pragmatic, Less Theological Open Letter to Egalitarians has a list of 10 questions that hopefully will help egalitarians and complementarians explore the intersection between doctrine and daily life.  The comment section is open now, and later this year he will provide a summarizing post.

For example, Mike would like to hear from egalitarians who are willing to weigh in on insightful questions:  If the Titanic disaster were to happen again, would you desire 50% of the seats on the life boats to be left for men?

His list is not limited to hypothetical questions.  For example:  Do egalitarian parents train their boys that it is okay for them to be "stay at home dads?"  If so, does a lot of domestic training happen with these boys?

I am eager to read the comments and gain additional insights into the inner workings of egalitarian marriages.  To wit:  If two egalitarians are married with children, and they hear a noise downstairs at night, should the man or the woman go downstairs to investigate, or would it depend on who had done it the last time?

To the many egalitarians who regularly read and give us feedback at Gender Blog, I would like to thank you for engaging with us in this ongoing dialogue.  I would appreciate if you would invite your friends to comment over at Role Calling to help complementarians better understand the practical outworking of the egalitarian doctrinal position. 

Thanks in advance; I look forward to reading your comments there.